Signs You May Get Fired Soon
Six Ways College Grads Botch Job Searches
Eight Things You Need To Know About Recruiters / Don’t Waste Their Time—And Yours!
9 Resume Writing Mistakes That Make Your Resume Downright Awful–Or Just Mediocre
Age Discrimination in Hiring: Are You Making It Worse?
Salary Negotiations: Avoid This $100K Mistake
How To Actually Enjoy Networking Events
Hate Networking Events? You’re Not Alone
Do you have to drag yourself to networking events? Do you find yourself awkwardly nursing a drink or staking out the food table, wishing you were somewhere else? But you force yourself to stay because managing these events well is crucial to get hired or build your business.
Fortunately, there are some high-quality resources available to help you build your skills. Just one of these is Debra Fine’s “The Fine Art of Small Talk,” available both as a book and a recording.
Using her advice, you can enjoy networking events. Really. Here are a few samples of her advice.
Prepare For Networking Events
Brainstorm before networking events to come up with three or more topics you can use to initiate conversation or to pick things up when conversation drags. Topics might include films and TV shows, current events, and happenings in your community.
How to Get The Other Person Talking
Be sure to go after more information, digging deeper into what people tell you. These phrases can help to develop memorable conversations:
- Tell me more.
- How did that happen?
- What led you to do that?
- Is that something I can do?
Networking Event Key: Use open-ended questions
Open-ended questions like these are more likely to get people talking.
What made you move to Kenilworth?
How did you get started into your current job?
What do you see as the biggest obstacles to success in your industry?
Closed
questions get short answers.
Is your company located in Winnetka?
Do you live here in Highland Park?
Do you read the Wall Street Journal?
What’s your sign?
Not only are closed questions unlikely to develop good conversations, but asking too many closed questions can make the other person feel uncomfortable. They might even feel interrogated and wonder if you’re with the FBI.
Networking Event Strategy: Use Free Information
We often can get what she calls “free information” from others through their appearance, words, and behavior. Grab onto this free information and use it to open up great conversations.
1) Words
Many times, people tell us things that provide an opening to find out about them:
- When we moved to Winnetka …
- When I left my position at Chicago Faucet in Des Plaines …
- Because I grew up on Chicago’s south side, I know …
Ask questions about this free information to develop conversations:
- What made you move to Winnetka?
- What do you think of the corporate culture at Chicago Faucet?
- Did you enjoy living on the south side?
Want to talk to us about your career advancement?
2) Appearance
If you’re living in cold-winter places like Chicago or Milwaukee and you run across someone with a suntan in the middle of January, chances are they’ve taken a trip somewhere interesting—or at least know of a good tanning facility. Ask them about it.
At a small networking event, a man had a cast on his leg. When someone asked what happened, he said it was a skiing accident. This helped everyone in the room to get to know him better and generated some good-natured ribbing that got everyone laughing.
You might ask a woman wearing a distinctive piece of jewelry about where it came from and how she happened to find it.
3) Behavior–When you encounter a woman whose accent isn’t local, you might ask why she came to the United States or what part of the country she is from.
You might ask why she moved to the US
You might ask a woman who is left handed what issues come up with being a lefty.
If you see a man wearing a Chicago Cubs tie or lapel pin, you might ask about the first Cubs game he attended or who is his favorite Chicago player.
4) Occasion/Location-Questions about the event you’re or the spot of your encounter.
At a seminar: What led you to sign up for this seminar?
At an association meeting: How did you come to choose this field?
At a political rally: What led you to support this candidate?
At Joe’s birthday party: How do you know Joe?
At Networking Events: Don’t Create Awkwardness
Ms. Fine also advises keeping questions with acquaintances more general to avoid blundering into uncomfortable situations.
If you see John once or twice a year, don’t ask him, “How is that great job at Grainger in Lake Forest going?” He may have been demoted or fired since you last saw him. Instead, ask him, “How’s work going?” That way, he can tell you whatever he wants.
Similarly, don’t ask Sally, “How’s that gorgeous husband of yours?” Maybe he left her. You’re just an acquaintance. She doesn’t want to discuss her marital trauma with you. So instead, ask her something like, “What’s new with the family?” Again, this gives Sally the chance to share whatever she wants, without having to delve into painful issues.
Interested in Debra Fine’s book?
Develop Your Networking Event Skills
I encourage you to equip yourself with these powerful tools Ms. Fine discusses. They can turn awful networking events into enjoyable ones and help you create relationships that can last for years. Getting hired, staying employed, getting new business, and being promoted are all about chemistry.
If you’re ready to move up or go in another direction in your career, don’t waste another day. Let’s talk. Call 847-673-0339 or send us a note. — Steve Frederick and Jack Chapman
Job Interview Tip: How to Turn Rejection To Opportunity
That Job interview was so promising. Then you get the rejection note.
You had great rapport. The conversation was stimulating. You were excited. You were as good as hired. And then they said no?
What now?

Of course, it’s terribly disappointing. You might be tempted to get mad and scream at the employer (in the privacy of your home, of course).
Vent if you must, but then, get smart.
One of the three things that win job interviews is good human relations (the other two are enthusiasm and clear communications). Use your good human relations to your advantage to turn this situation around.
Job Interview Success and Human Relations
Since empathy is a key to good human relations, think about what’s going on with the boss. You had good rapport. She liked you and saw you as a good candidate. But apparently, someone she liked better came along. Or she was forced to hire her boss’s nephew. Or it may have been a toss-up between you and another candidate. Chances are, she feels awful about having to reject you.
Overcome the awkwardness after the job interview
Since she rejected you, there is awkwardness. It’s like when you go on a date and tell the person you don’t want to go out with him/her again. It’s hard to face them. If you see them on the street or in an elevator, it would be awkward. There’s been a breakdown in the relationship.
Smart job hunters know that it’s important to address and heal this awkwardness. How do you do that?
Send a letter of appreciation
As you know, the good old-fashioned thank you note is much appreciated, but a very small percentage of candidates send one. This is a big mistake. Thank you notes give you the chance to stand out from the crowd. Let the boss know that you appreciate that she took time out of her day to meet with you. Hopefully, you did that already.
All right, but you’ve already been rejected, so what now? Send a note of appreciation. Let her know that you understand that she picked the person that seemed best for the job. Give your best wishes both to her and to the candidate who got the job.
As I’ve said, few people bother to send a thank you note after the interview. Almost no one thanks the boss after being rejected. If you do, you will probably be the only one.
Now, take this further.
Contact the boss and ask if you might add him to your network. Not just your LinkedIn network. Many of us have thousands of LinkedIn connections, including people from other continents who we will never meet in this lifetime. We add people, and they just sit there in our list of connections and rot.
Try to make them part of your real network, and stay in touch.
Ask if you might meet the boss for networking
If he’s willing, draw on the boss’s knowledge of what’s going on in his company, in the industry, with vendors, and their customers. He may well be able to refer you to others in his company or to people he knows in other companies. The boss can give a boost to your efforts to build your visibility and credibility and meet the people who can hire you.
Remember that in the job hunt, you are planting seeds when you make connections. You never know when they may sprout.

Sometimes, the results are quick. The candidate who seemed like the best person for the job doesn’t work out. One client from Winnetka got hired within weeks of being rejected. The candidate they hired received another offer a month after starting the new job. When he abruptly quit, the boss called our client.
Other times, the seed may sprout many months or years later—if you keep in touch. A client from Glenview stayed in touch with an executive with whom he’d had good rapport in an interview and got hired three years later.
It’s a small world. You never know when someone you interview with will resurface. Make sure you make the most of each and every contact.
Contact us about our job interview coaching. We’ll help you get in the driver’s seat in your next interview.
Be Your Own Executive Resume Writer? Huge Mistake (usually)
Some people say, “never hire an executive resume writer. Why pay someone? You can do yourself! It’s your resume. How can someone else to write it?”
But is that good advice? That depends …
During my many years as an executive resume writer and career coach, I’ve seen a few people who wrote fabulous resumes for themselves. A CFO client from Glencoe did a fabulous job on his resume—and got it all on one page! I was impressed.
But I’ve seen many, many more truly awful resumes come from do-it-yourself writers. Being frugal is fine, but not at the cost of making a poor impression.
You MAY want to be your own resume writer if:
- You’re a good writer and you understand how to craft a resume.
- You want to save some money and that money is more valuable to you than the time you could be spending on other aspects of your job campaign.
But don’t deceive yourself. Writing your own resume is tricky. Here are nine reasons why you might want to let an executive resume writer do it for you.
BTW, if you’re already thinking that you need some help–we’re glad to provide assistance. See our resume page.
1) You may not understand the technical aspects of ATS
A human being might think your professional resume is the greatest ever written, but the Applicant Tracking System (ATS) may not recognize that you exist (Applicant Tracking System refers to software many companies use to screen resumes and help with other aspects of the hiring process).
You may languish in the bowels of an electronic database because your resume doesn’t have the right keywords and/or formatting to be chosen as a viable candidate for the position for which you applied.
2) You aren’t a talented writer
Writing isn’t your strong suit. Fine. We often hire other professionals to do work in areas where we’re not skilled. Most of us would rather have a mechanic fix the transmission on our car and a plumber repair a hard-to-reach pipe.
Why waste a lot of your precious time creating a resume that won’t make you look good?
3) You don’t want to brag, and you’re not feeling so good about yourself
The boss just yelled at you—again. You fear your head is on the boss’s chopping block. Or you just landed in the corporate dung heap. You’re not feeling real good about yourself at the moment. So how in the world are you going to write a great resume?
To make things more difficult, your dad told you never to brag. Your boss insisted that you talk about the team “we,” rather than the individual “I.” It’s tough to undo that teaching and actually take credit for your great work.Don’t grab credit for something someone else did, but DO describe how you contributed to a team effort.
When a football team scores a touchdown, eleven players contribute to the effort. The running back makes a great fake, the quarterback heaves an accurate forty-yard strike, the tight end grabs the ball and hangs on as he’s belted by the safety. All the while, the offensive linemen kept the quarterback safe from the 300-pound monsters trying to smash him.
Tell what you did to make the team successful.
4) You can’t tell a good resume from a mediocre (or awful) one
Libraries and bookstores are full of wretched resume books (and a few that are good). The wretched resume books, some of which sell quite well, are responsible for many of the awful resumes used in unproductive job searches.
5) You’ve been busy DOING great things, not describing them.
Many people have spent years doing great work without ever stopping to think about how to talk about what they did. I’ve talked to many senior executives who have amazing stories to tell, but you’d never know it by listening to them talk. You read between the lines and know the great resume material is there.
A good career professional can help to flesh this out.
When a client showed the resume we developed to his wife, she exclaimed, “I finally understand what you do!” He’d never been able to tell her clearly.
6) Not digging deep enough.
This common mistake is related to #4. Many executives just scratch the surface of their accomplishments.
I talked to a man who had managed an investment portfolio worth many millions. He thought people would be impressed by the size of the portfolio. Maybe so. But when I probed to find out how his portfolio performed, his accomplishment was much more impressive.
Digging deep is the difference between making an OK impression and having a boss salivating to talk to you.
7) Using too much technical jargon
Pity the poor Human Resources person (and other non-technical folks in your search) trying to decipher resumes using all sorts of technical terms they don’t comprehend. Actually, pity you, if you sent the resume to them. They will probably throw it away.
If your audience doesn’t have a clue about what you’re talking about or why they should care, that’s a problem. Writing in language the average person can understand can help to open doors. This is especially true because of the importance of communicating across disciplines in today’s work world. If your resume doesn’t show you can do this, you may get passed over.
8) Resume writing can be extremely time-consuming
I’ve seen people spend many weeks and months futzing around with their resume. This is extremely expensive. I myself have hired people to write mine. I can whip out someone else’s resume really quickly, but find it excruciating to do my own. I made a decision that my time was worth more than the expense of hiring a colleague.
This brings up another issue. People often keep working and reworking their resume because it’s easier than doing scary things like talking to strangers. At a certain point, you have to say, this resume is good enough. I’m going to declare it done and move on.
9) A good resume professional can improve how you speak about yourself
If your resume stinks, chances are very good that the way you speak about yourself stinks too. But how do you know?
People you encounter in job search tend to be polite. They don’t tell you that they have no idea about what you want to do. They won’t tell you they don’t understand what you did on your last job. They smile at you, say it was nice to meet you, and they’re done with you. It’s hard to get honest feedback. Consequently, you can burn through lots of contacts and waste weeks and months spinning your wheels.
With other do-it-yourself projects, you get quick feedback. Years ago, when I tried to plaster a ceiling, most of the plaster fell to the floor and what stuck looked awful. I knew right away that what I was doing wasn’t working.
A bad resume won’t give you that kind of useful feedback.
Don’t be like this man!
A man we met with recently said that for months, he had been applying online to four or five jobs every single day. Zero interviews. Not one. His resume didn’t have the right stuff to get past the software filters most companies use, and even if it did, it was so unimpressive that it would quickly get tossed in the trash. That kind on ineffectiveness is mighty expensive when you’re unemployed– and exasperating when you are.
In summary, some people do very well writing their own resume. However, many more fall victim to the pitfalls mentioned in this article (and more!). If you do decide to write your own resume, be sure to get feedback from someone knowledgeable so you know you’re on track. If you do hire a resume professional, be sure to choose wisely. After all, there are companies who love to prey on the unemployed. Resume writer and LinkedIn profile writer scams are common.
–BTW, the resume is only about ten percent of what it takes to get hired. Make sure you’re doing the other things right too. Call me if you want to talk: 847 673 0339.